Picture the EASY button from that popular office supply store but imagine that it says STOP instead. I hit that button this morning. I’ve been to scared to push it before now. Sure that fear and disappointment would make me change my mind. Do you do that? Your heart whispering to you, so determined that you DO or don’t DO something but your brain is too afraid that you will disappoint someone? Do something out of character? Fail to meet a deadline or fulfill a commitment. Saying yes and running crazy busy, chasing that one great moment when you should have said no and enjoyed that one great hour. That’s me! This morning was different. This morning I got up to start my morning routine and I froze….in my jammies….in the middle of the bathroom. My hubby looked at me a bit funny when it happened. I played it off as my foot being asleep from…uhm…well, delicate stuff that required sitting. My heart, no longer whispering but in full-blown panic attack. STOP!
It’s Sunday. STOP meant missing another Sunday service. Instead, church was a steaming cup of vanilla chai at the table in my front window. I watched God’s greatness in the snow that was gently falling and gave thanks for the feathered and furry creatures sharing food together on my porch. It makes my heart smile to know that I’m not the only one that uses that space to share food and drink with friends.
STOP meant NOT running for the workroom to work on a class that’s fast approaching. I’m thankful for the gift of creativity but that time will need to be rescheduled for later. I’m tired and creativity would not be at its finest. Instead, I sat with the hubby and shared the latest episode of The Pioneer Woman, warming sunshine pouring through the sliding door, across the floor, to the sofa.
STOP meant NOT pulling out my planner, to-do list and colored markers to start mapping out the next week with all its tasks, deadlines and such. I’m thankful for the gift of organization but not to the point that my OCD has reached manic mode. My Happy Planner is sitting on the dining room table, open to today and the note that I had written earlier in the week that said “Find time to REST”. Instead, I took the LONGEST shower ever. I took my time and enjoyed every last drop of hot water in the tank. I left the bathroom to find my kid putting fresh from the dryer warm, clean sheets on my bed. After which, we enjoyed chocolate chip pancakes and several games of Jenga while soaking up more of those sun rays.
STOP meant NOT suiting up in my winter gear to head out to the store for forgotten dinner ingredients. Swapping those slow-cooked barbacoa tacos for hubby’s skillet chili five-way tonight. Instead, Hubby and the Kid spent quality time together running for those ingredients while I sat, listening to a favorite in the planner community talk about resetting her life, working on a brain dump and my goal sheets. They’ll be more about that later.
STOP meant NOT logging into Facebook, checking Instagram or spending mindless minutes on Pinterest. It meant not paying attention to the Seahawk/Panthers game blaring on the T.V. (okay….so, I might have been paying just a bit of attention – go Panthers!!) Instead, it meant opening up my forgotten laptop, pulling up a blank page and writing down all those words that begging to be shared with you all on my slightly ignored blog. There are so many things I want to share with you. Not just crafty things and planner goodness but life things including the unpolished and less than shiny stuff.
I need more days like this. I’ve had a heck of a year or three. I think my heart is right. I’ll be pressing that STOP button more often. Slowing down, saying no, enjoying some of those things on the bottom of my to-do list like sitting in the sunshine writing, whipping up a family favorite in the kitchen, and using up the very last drop of hot water.
-enjoy!
jen
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